You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
