Define "chronic" masturbator.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
