You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize