In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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