is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Pants are for mortals
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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