Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
