new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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