So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize