Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
