Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
