So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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