Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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