dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
