You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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