I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
should my penis look like a turkey
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
