Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I bet he comes in French.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize