if i can run in heels then i can drive
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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