I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
