i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
