Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
