Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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