i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
How external is "for external use only"?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
