looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize