There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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