But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
