hotel room ftw
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
We don't watch enough power rangers
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
