More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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