I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize