..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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