apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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