i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
