There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
40s are totally the cure
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
