so that wasnt chicken after all
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
