That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
