I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
