yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize