and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
