Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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