shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
