Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
