I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize