i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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