I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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