I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
