bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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