she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Naked. naked and bneed help.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
