his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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