Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
