I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
