it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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