Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
